I was thinking : when men talk about virility, we often talk about having big muscles, or a nice beard. If beards could talk about virility, “they” would certainly mention the name “Chuck Norris“.
Which one of us has never watched the movie “An eye for an eye”, “Delta Force” or the TV show “Texas Ranger”? Chuck won 7 times the professional karate championship. He’s the first westner to be given the rank of the 8th grade black belt grand master in “Tae Kwon Do”. Chuck also masters “judo”, “brazilian jiu-jitsu”, “tang soo do” and because no martial art is a challenge for him, he created the “Chun Kuk Do”.
In real life Chuck did lost some fights, before becoming THE BEST. In movies, he has only lost once, it was against another martial art god “Bruce Lee”. (Guess which one of them is still alive 😉 ).
Despite his will, Chuck became a true legend on internet, some cool short stories named “facts” try to remember to each one of us that Chuck is beyond a human being. Check out some here.
- Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
- While other children were playing in sand, Chuck was playing in concrete
- Chuck Norris makes fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes together.
- Chuck Norris once fought superman. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.
- Chuck Norris has a diary. It’s called the Guinness Book of World Records.
- There once was a street called Chuck Norris, but the name was changed for public safety because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
- Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
- Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
- Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
- Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack… even a heart isnt foolish enough to attack Chuck Norris.
- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
- There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
- Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
- When Bruce Banner gets mad he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad he turns into Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris gets mad, run.
- Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone
- Cars look both ways before Chuck Norris crosses the street.
- Chuck Norris’s computer has no “backspace” button, Chuck Norris doesn’t make mistakes.
- Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris’ PC will crash.
- Chuck Norris won an arm wrestling match with both hands tied behind his back.
- Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can’t get up the courage to tell him.
- Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
- Some people wear a superman pyjama, Superman wears a Chuck Norris’s
I like to believe some of these “facts” aren’t real, nobody can beat Superman, not even the omnipotent Chuck Norris. But I have to admit that in a fight between Chuck and Son Goku I don’t really know who would win, lmao. Interest to note that, even a superhuman like Chuck knows he needs God if he wants to suceed in what he does. Peace everyone.
I definitely feel I do have God in my corner.